Pēpē #4 (“#4”) is three months now, and in short, we are still adjusting but doing great. Number 4’s due date was July 18. There was a lot of excitement as baby’s due date approached with many guesses that baby would come early. I remember my Braxton Hicks getting pretty intense at times, and sometimes it felt as if there was a regular pattern around dinner time.
But in my mind, in consideration of how accurate my due dates have been in the past–my second child was born on her due date and my third child was born 2.5 hours after his due date–I thought that baby was either going to come on the due date or after. Although I thought this, I also felt more and more uncomfortable as our due date approached. I remember feeling the need to stay close to home, not stay out too long, and the importance of resting up as much as possible before baby was born.
Similar to all of my babies’ births so far, #4 came during the night. In preparation for #4’s birth, and reflecting on our last birth with Pēpē #3, we wanted to make sure that we would be able to get the tub set up quickly. Lightning speed quick. I remember telling my husband that he better do some drills, or what ever he needs to do, in order to make sure that the tub is ready this time.
On the days leading up to baby’s birth, this time it felt different than this period of waiting before the births of my other babies. For the first time, I wasn’t too anxious or focused on getting everything ready. Things were ready…enough, I guess you could say. I felt very relaxed and happy just doing nothing. I would drop off the kids at school/daycare, then go and enjoy nature at the park. It was wonderful.
The night before baby was born, a dear friend texted me in a way to subtly let me know that baby would be born that night. I felt ready. Despite having birthed babies more than once at this point, I still feel as if it’s the first time in many ways. But like with every preparation for birth, we prepare as much as we can. Getting ready in every aspect: physically, mentally, emotionally.
In anticipation for baby’s arrival, I knew for sure that I needed to get to bed as early as possible. I remember sleeping lightly. It was probably partially excitement, and partially nervousness. While half-sleeping, I remember feeling some Braxton Hicks and doing my best to not focus on it too much. Then my water broke.
Pop! I remember thinking, “did my water just break? Nah…just go back to sleep. Oh wait, I think my water broke.” Then I stood up, and sure enough, my water broke.
Noticing the pattern of my prior births, I went to the bathroom to wipe up and immediately told my husband that it was time. I think it’s when my water breaks that that turns a switch in my mind and it’s “all business” so to say. “Business” in terms of being disciplined and doing what we prepared and practiced with regards to tools and pacing that I know works for me while laboring and preparing for baby’s transition to Earthside.
Unlike our last birth, my mom came to pick up my older kids and got to our place relatively quickly. I remember hearing her voice and her asking my husband a bunch of questions while I was laboring in our bedroom. I closed our bedroom door so that I was better able to focus on remaining relaxed and breathing.
Before we knew it, the contractions were intense and it felt like it was time.
Oh wait, did I mention that my midwife didn’t arrive yet? Haha Oh yeah, minor detail. (Half serious.)
I went to the bathroom, and I was ready to get in the tub. All of my husband’s drills and training paid off: the tub was ready! At this point, I didn’t know how dilated I was. All I knew is that the contractions were intense and I figured that if it was too early and if my contractions “stalled”, then I would just get back out of the tub. If anything, I would just get in the tub for a breather then get out if I needed to.
After getting in the tub, and I will never forget this, my husband asked me, “do you want me to check how dilated you are?” At the time I was thinking, “WTH! Um….wait, did our midwife tell my husband to ask me that?” I told my husband, nah. Even ’til this day, I trip out thinking about how my husband asked me this; he gettum 😉
The water is so helpful to me, but I also remember feeling so much pressure still.
Our midwife’s assistant arrives, and I remember thinking to myself, “ok, baby is going to come now.”
Then it happened.
Without any thought or conscious effort, this force and wave of energy seemed to push thru me to bring baby forth. In.One.Push. In one push, baby went from inside of me to outside of me. Baby hung out with head exposed until the next wave of energy came to being completely exposed.
I embraced baby and brought baby to my chest. This moment is like no other. Time stands still. Everyone and everything else in the room seems to fade away. All the pain and what ever brought us to this point fades away.
It wasn’t until minutes after holding baby on my chest did we realize to check if baby is a girl or boy. Itʻs a GIRL!!! Healthy.
If I had describe this birth in one word, it would be “peaceful.” Even with baby’s speedy transition, two hours from the time my water broke ʻtil the time she was born, I felt very much at peace.
We are filled with so much aloha and so thankful. In awe and giving thanks.
