Not every māmā’s take on this pandemic

It is hard to believe that so many months have passed since my last post. Heck, it’s hard to believe it’s October!!! Can you believe we’ve spent the majority of the year forever changed as a result of this COVID-19 pandemic? And despite these many months, at times what seemed like endless months, it all feels very new at the same time. I guess that’s how it is, like floating in the ocean not really knowing where land or your destination is, not knowing with certainty when this pandemic will supposedly “end.”

But here’s what I do know: I continue to find myself so overwhelmed with emotions and continue to find so much to be thankful for.

I know what I am about to share isn’t part of the majority, or most common trend of what is happening. And for a while, although I wanted to share this, I felt hesitant because I didn’t want my experience to be misconstrued. Nevertheless, I thought this was worth sharing.

In many ways, this pandemic has brought so much abundance and wealth to our ʻohana. This may seem ironic, especially since my husband lost his job earlier this year. But here’s the thing: I’ve been able to work in ways that I couldn’t pre-pandemic. This does NOT mean that we are rich, and does NOT negate the grave severity of the pandemic.

Let me back up a little…

Ever since becoming a mother, I’ve always struggled with finding work opportunities that would allow me to balance my other kuleana (responsibilities). With my hiapo (my eldest child), this meant finding work opportunities that would be do-able while also juggling law school. Thinking back on that time period now, when I was a new māmā with an infant who occasionally accompanied me to class and selectively took a bottle, I don’t know how I did it. Hah! And now, with four keiki, this looked like me juggling various part-time gigs that I could do from home.

Then the pandemic happens and prompted the shift to a work from home situation.

Like never before, I felt seen as others shared their frustrations of the difficulties of working from home with kids also at home. Because you see, this work from home situation had been my normal and actually my desired work set up in many ways. Working from home with kids crawling all over you while you’re trying to type a damn email is certainly challenging, but for me, this is how I feel most balanced. Balanced in the sense of being able to tend to kuleana māmā.

Not only did working from home become more “acceptable,” it seems, but work opportunities that were previously not an option for me became available to me.

I hope that we continue to push forward in working in new ways, in spaces that previously seemed taboo, and making our own paths. And I hope everyone shares their story because while there are likely areas we are similar, there are also differences that should be celebrated broadly. I mean, it wasn’t that long ago that it seemed outrageous for a woman to work outside of the home.